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Real Talk from the HBIC
The Head Blogstress in Charge

GOOD MORNING BEAUTIFUL, IF YOUCARE...

12/2/2015

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So today I woke up to a text that said, "good morning beautiful, if you care...". I chuckled. You see the same person has text me "Good morning beautiful" every single morning since like forever [teeth suck]. At the risk of sounding ungrateful for such a kind gesture lemme start off by saying that I told this son of a gun that I work at night. Heck, he met me at work while I was working at night [blank stare]. So ummmmm errrrrrr damn near a year in and I am still getting a text at 8 o' clock in the morning. It is like me texting a person who I know goes to bed at 10pm at 3am every friggin morning just to say "hi". Like, who does that [raised eyebrow]? Like, REM has just started to take over; consciousness has been lost. I am, for all intents and purposes in a coma. Many times I ignore the text or simply reciprocate the banter when I wake which is usually hours later. It appears that my actions or lack thereof have stuck a cord and my morning greeting is now accompanied with cynicism, facetiousness, and guilting. SoOoooOOoooOoooo because I am who I am and I do what I do, let me break some shit down.

I am beautiful. I know this. I do  not say that with conceit or with arrogance. I say that with confidence and understanding of self. A text in the morning does not re-emphasize that for me nor does it assure me that your thoughts of me are greater than my thoughts of myself. It is a kind gesture at best. But is it? Is it kind if you know that truly it is an interruption to my day; heck my sleep pattern? Is it because I am the first person you think of when you rise? Or is it that you just hit the I's on your rolodex of "good morning beautiful" recipients? I am certain you will say that I am the only one [side eye]. Does that mean that you care enough about me to understand what motivates me; what makes me tick? Do you know what it is that will make my heart go boom? Or are you coming at me like the average Jane; doing what worked with her but forgetting that I am not [well] average. You see I question if you [really] care. If you did [care] would you say consider the make up of me. You would think about how best to meet me halfway; in the middle. Instead you want me to adjust to you. You would like me to adjust my patterns to better suit yours. When I do not or seem unmoved you still do not look at my circumstance. You decide that I should feel guilted into an 8am convo that boils down to stroking your ego. Ummmmm errrrrr, you can count that as a negative. It is not going to happen and it simply affirms for me that I need to continue doing what I do; turning over and going back to sleep. You have truly given me nothing to "care" about. 

I will drop this here with this final thought. Ladies do not confuse selfish gestures with kind ones. On the surface it can be difficult to differentiate. Sometimes we change and adapt to please a situation [or a person] that is unwilling to change or adapt for us. They treat us ordinary but are looking for extraordinary treatment to be given in return. All attention is not good. Look at the intent and let that be your guide.  And let me be clear, there is nothing wrong with a "good morning beautiful" if you wake up in the morning [lip curl] and especially if that's your thing. Everybody has a thing. But errrrrrrrr ummmmm how much does that really mean if you typically wake up in the afternoon [teeth suck]? Okay, buy my book & carry on.


Would you like more real talk from India L. Trotter? Buy her latest book Real Talk - Unsolicited Advice from a Blogger Chick by clicking here.

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    India L. Trotter

    India Trotter is founder of Blank Stare Corner. She is no stranger to freelance article and online writing. She writes as she speaks so to draw you in; touching on topics of everyday life, personal growth and emotional development. A long time native Philly resident who was raised in San Diego, California - She shows a bi-coastal way of thinking; more like, a beach bum attitude with an East Coast edge. She has a degree in Business Administration but in her mind that equates to a degree in Psychology [blank stare]. Her advice and rhetoric comes from life experience and common sense; which is apparently not so common. She writes the blog the Pointed Circle featured on www.GirlTiniLive.com and tune in to hear her co-host the online radio show GirlTiniLive Uncensored. She is also the Philadelphia Frugal Living Examiner for Examiner.com.

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